King: Have you discovered the real reason for Hamlet's craziness?
Rosencrantz: He does confess that he is and will not speak about it.
Guildenstern: It was hard to talk to him.
Queen: Was he excited to see you?
Rosencrantz: Most like a gentleman.
Guildenstern: But with much difficulty.
Rosencrantz: He was difficult to talk to; like talking to a brick wall.
Queen: Did you do some of your pastimes?
Rosencrantz: He was excited at the arrival of the players.
Polonius: Very true.
King: I see that he is happy and I am happy. Encourage him to be happy about the play.
Rosencrantz: We will.
King: We need to leave and make it look like an accident that Ophelia is here.
Queen: I will obey. And for your part, Ophelia, I do wish that your beauty is the reason Hamlet is mad. I hope you will bring him back to normal.
Ophelia: Ma'am, I hope it does.
Polonius: Ophelia, you will walk here. - Do it slowly so we can hide. - Read this book and show your loneliness. - We do bad things for good reasons, Ophelia.
King: That is true! I can't say what is on my mind, and I can't fix the mistake that I made.
Polonius: I hear him coming. Let's leave, my lord.
Hamlet: To be, or not to be, that is the question: whether it is nobler in the mind to suffer in life or to end it all. To die, to sleep - no more; and in death there is no more. Everyone may wish good things to happen but it will not always happen. To die, to sleep; to sleep and dream nicely; there is the dud. For in that sleep of death what dreams may come, when we have left this body, we get peace. There is the respect that one gets for living through life. For who would bear the whips and scorns of time, the oppressor's wrong, the proud man's rudeness, the pangs of despised love, the law of delay, the insult of office, and the spurns that patient merit of the unworthy takes, when he himself might his death make with a bare dagger? Who would bear this suffrage in a weary life? Everyone is scared of what undiscovered terrain comes after death because no traveler has returned. This lowers one's confidence. Everyone is a coward because everyone fears death. We tend to think things are scarier than they really are. Someone may talk themselves out of doing what they were originally going to do. - The fair Ophelia! You are my life.
Ophelia: How are you?
Hamlet: Fine, thank you.
Ophelia: I have some things of yours.
Hamlet: No, not me; I never gave you those.
Ophelia: You know you did. I am giving them back because their affections are gone. Please take them back.
Hamlet: Ha ha! Are you a virgin?
Ophelia: Excuse me?
Hamlet: Are you honest?
Ophelia: What do you mean?
Hamlet: How can you still be a virgin when you are so beautiful?
Ophelia: What does beauty have to do with virginity?
Hamlet: Beautiful people will eventually give in. I did love you once.
Ophelia: I believe you did.
Hamlet: You shouldn't have believed me.
Ophelia: I was deceived.
Hamlet: Go to a nunnery. Why would you be a breeder of sinners? I am honest, but I have done bad things. I am proud, revengeful and ambitious. We are all arrant knaves, do not believe any of us. Go to a nunnery. Where is your father?
Ophelia: At home, Hamlet.
Hamlet: If you're going to play the fool, do it in your own house.
Ophelia: Help him, dear lord!
Hamlet: If you get married, I will give you the plague as your wedding gift. Marry a fool when you are ready to. Wise men would see right through you. Go to a nunnery quickly. Farewell.
Ophelia: O heavenly powers, restore him!
Hamlet: Those who wear too much make-up are not as they seem. You joke, you don't make sense, and you baby-talk. You nickname God's creatures, and you make your lacking your ignorance. I will speak no more. No one from this point on will marry; if they are already married, they shall live that way. Go to a nunnery, go.
Ophelia: He's gone and with it his courtier's, soldier's, scholar's, eye, tongue, sword, and his right to the thrown. I feel like a wretch. I believed all of your sweet words. I don't believe we can get him back!
King: Love? This didn't look like love, but it wasn't like madness. I think he will be dangerous. He will be shipped to England to collect unpaid taxes. Maybe if he is away for a while he will straighten up. Polonius, what do you think?
Polonius: Okay, I agree, but I think it's still love. Come, Ophelia. You don't need to tell us what Hamlet has said, we heard it all. Do what you wish, but after the play.